Death: Desperately Seeking The Stupid!
Continuing the theme of strange deaths and questionable common sense, here’s part two of Kenneth Bailey’s article, “We All Have To Go Sometime”:
“A chap called Stratton, from England, recently decided to end it all after a row with his wife. He made up his mind that gassing himself would be the easiest way out, so he settled himself down by the oven and waited for the ‘big sleep’. What he hadn’t taken into consideration was the fact that he had been converted to North Sea gas so nothing happened. When he realised what he had done, he developed second thoughts and decided to think things over, so he lit up a cigar…
Eating and drinking aren’t necessarily safe pastimes either. An eighteenth century glutton called Biggars had a snack one evening consisting of salad, twelve dumplings, a gallon of beer, a loaf of bread and six pounds of bacon. He apparently enjoyed the meal, but it was to be his last as he had an attack of apoplexy immediately afterwards and met his maker. This was hardly surprising considering the amount he had consumed, but even if you don’t overdo it you’re not guaranteed to escape. The poet Johnson was in a bar in 1902 when he decided to leave after having just one drink. Unfortunately he fell from the bar stool as he was getting up to leave and died on the spot.
In 1951, A German carpenter was working on a roof when a freak six foot long spear of ice fell from the sky and split him in two. The origin of the ice was never established, unlike the lump of frozen offal which fell out of an aircraft, fatally striking a German farm worker in 1968. It seems that if you’re in Germany, it is advisable to wear a crash helmet outdoors!
Here’s One I Made Earlier
In Peru, in 1971, Catalina Ledesma gave her five children some cakes for tea. Within an hour, four of them were dead. Local authority investigators concluded that a strong insecticide had got mixed in with the sugar she had used so they destroyed the remaining sugar. Five days later, the funeral was held and Mrs Ledesma served the mourners a meal which included some more cakes. One hour later another seven people were dead including Mrs Ledesma herself. Police discovered that the insecticide was in the flour, the sugar was okay.”
Keep an eye out for the final part of Kenneth’s article where he regales us with a few more stories about the unfortunate and the just plain stupid…